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Things are different ladies and gentlemen.

I've made a million decisions, or so it seems, over the time span of my last post alone. Everything feels like puzzle pieces and broken glass. I'm not really sure what's going on and I'm sticking with something that usually frightens me. San Francisco was put on hold by someone I've met, someone who seemed to come along when everything began to feel like a flooding room. I only had so much time to gather my shit and escape before drowning. I'm getting used to the responsibility of belonging to someone else, but I've managed to keep my morals, goals, and characteristics in check and balanced. I'm happy about my decision to stay. All of the things and all of the people I was afraid of leaving/losing are still going to be within reach and now I have someone to fall asleep with when I'm drunk and scared, someone to protect me, someone to kiss, play with, and someone who makes me feel like a fallen angel. I'm happy for now,though, I don't want to look too far ahead into the future in hopes that I'll keep myself from getting any hopes up and getting hurt.

I've not been eating very much at all. Probably rounding about 700-850 calories a day with the exception of yesterday when I allowed myself half of a pizza from his work. I'm not eating because food doesn't present itself in the way it did, and hey, I'm losing weight so there's a plus there. I'm sure I'll go back to eating just fine in the next couple of weeks or whenever I get needy for some junk food like I did last night. Everything is turning out fine for now. I got a new job at a coffee shop which happens to be home to the most delicious chai latte around. It's so amazing, and now I know how to make it! I'm excited to get a regular paycheck again, money is always stressful, but now I'm glad I'll get a little something here and there.

All is well.