I'm drunk. writing this makes no sense because my fingers are almost too loose to write anything. I'm very drunk and lately that's been good for me. I broke curfew again and woke up in my boyfriend's bed...naked. I had too much to drink and embarrassed us both in front of our boxing team. I ended up being driven home and balling my eyes out because my mom had called and said I was done for. He drove me home and walked me inside. We both got in trouble and as I grasped at his shirt and begged him to stay with me, he used his strength to shut the door on me. I went to my mom's room and broke down and explained between sobs that he was going to leave me for my own benefit because he didn't want to be the reason I got into trouble. I begged her, at three in the morning, to let me get into my car and try to find him.
She let me go.
I found him.
I snatched the keys out of my car and ran up the dark street and into his arms where he told me he wouldn't leave. We sat on the curb as he told me that no one, with a snotty nose, crazy hair, tears, sobs, and inexplicable verbal debate, was like me. I drooled and snotted all over him and yet he held me and told me what I needed to hear. I think perhaps I really am happy. I dove drunk and convinced my very strict mother, to let me chase after someone that I was at first unsure about. I realized I felt differently. He knows what he has to do, but can we do it without each other? no.
I'm so drunk I'm wanting to wake up.
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