Rain, Rain, Stay,Stay, Stay

It's raining this morning with the echo of thunder and the brilliance of lightening. Rain makes me feel pensive, not depressed, just pensive... nostalgic if you will. I've been interviewing myself in the gray of my room all morning: "How are you doing?" "What does it feel like?" "What are your plans" "Who and what are you thankful for?" "What do you need?" "What will you do?" etc... I do this often to keep myself in sync with my entire self. I hate feeling disconnected (my mind one place and my body in another) it keeps me together. The rain keeps me together. For some people it brings mild panic because the roads are slick and their cars get dirty, but for some and I think most, it brings a blanketing calm over everything. Everything just gets kind of quiet. I put on a wool sweater and scarf for work and wonder how I will do in today's great plan and how each day brings a new kind of "missing you" that I put in the back of my mind until it becomes a numb sting. Rainy days make me feel like Laura Marling, they bring the powerful calm that she represents and I feel like I can only be close to her through the rainy weather. I need something to get close to. I need someone to wrap their arms around me and listen to the rain like a black and white picture show. I am thankful for listening ears today and I am thankful for the calm.